GREAT THINGS ABOUT IN-N-OUT BURGER
* Best fast food there is
* Secret Menu for devotees
* Holy shit — the Bible! (see below)
NOT-AS-GOOD THINGS ABOUT IN-N-OUT BURGER
* Privately owned and won't franchise
* None located East of the Mississippi
* I [...]

Turns out, Ross Martin sucks big time. Ashley pointed this out yesterday.
It's another Ross Martin, but still.
Seeing a site about how much someone with your name sucks is like seeing a photo of a gravesite with your name on it:
 

 
That sucks!
Here are some other Ross Martins, some of whom appear to suck more than me, some [...]

My friend Jesse Angelo introduced me to this incredible new, unsigned artist, Amalie Bruun, the other night.

I've been listening to her song, I Feel Sick, all week:
I feel sick
'Cause I had one too many, last night.
I couldn't sleep…
So I called up my good friend, the writer
He's in the bathroom right now.
In a moment, I will join [...]

Again we sent our intrepid office mate out to find out what exactly we are supposed to be doing. Here's Ashley Simon:
Thought I'd try one more time to see if the general public could help me figure out wtf branded entertainment is. This time I ventured to my hometown in Grosse Pointe, Michigan in [...]

Not sure when I first discovered that I can wiggle my ears, but for years it's come in handy, especially when I run out of things to say in awkward social situations. "Look what I can do," I'll exclaim, pretending that I'm surprised by my own ability, as if I just discovered I could [...]